Friday, December 11, 2009

"THE Talk"

"How do you tell your children about this? Don't you just dread that talk?" she asked.

I flinched at the questions. "No," I replied quickly, only to hear my heart whispering, "and yes, too."

A week ago, a simple white envelope in the mailbox gave my husband and me an evening where we paused in sadness, lowering our shoulders in defeat yet again. Because of one woman's lie to protect herself almost five years ago, my husband permanently lost his Louisiana law license earlier this year. And now, the other state where he practiced law, Mississippi, has done the same.

There went Plan B for his career and our family's future. But this time, there were no tears, no feeling of brokenness inside. Most days, we accept that God has caused this to happen for our eternal good. Most days, this catastrophic event is just something else to tuck away in our hearts as we move forward in a renewed life full of God's grace and blessings.

But my mother was right--he and I will need to sit the children down one day all too soon and tell them their daddy's story, a story any child can relate to of someone not telling the truth because she didn't want to get in trouble.

Since the Internet makes history permanently visible for public consumption, I don't want them relying on a google search for a definition of their father's character.

Google doesn't even tell a tenth of who he is.

It doesn't show a man who refused to lie when offered the deal to sell out somebody else in order to save himself and his family from this shame.

It doesn't tell of a man so generous with his money and time that the thought of him trying to defraud anybody is laughable.

It doesn't show the long days and nights he works to support his family only to come home and put in more hours playing with his children, changing diapers, and helping out with supper.

It doesn't tell of the humble spirit, the many hours he spends in God's word, the heart that loves Jesus.

No, Google doesn't show any of that.

And that's what I'll tell my children...when they're ready.

(Photo: My man, home from work and arms already full before the tie comes off.)


  1. As long as you stand by your man, believing in him, offering your heart as a safe haven for him from all the storms that he faces, then he will be okay. All a man needs is a wife that believes in him...and he'll move on to higher ground.

    Your post is an encouragement to me. I love the way you love your husband. The enemy is desperate to kill marriages, and of course, you won't let him do that.

    Yes, your children should hear the truth from your own lips. Google is really just a machine, a searchengine. It has no discenrment and is quite unable to sift truth from lies...

    Thank you for this post. Tell your man often that you believe in him. I pray that God will repay you more than what you expect or imagine for all the things that the enemy has stolen.


  2. Oh Jennifer, grace triumphs. And how your life, your words over flow that grace. Our plans B, C, D -- He makes them into A. What plans he must have for you and your family. I've prayed for you and Doug this morning. Your courage and grace inspire me today. (Well, most days.)

  3. I'm sorry, but this makes me so angry, I want to hunt this woman down and make her confess! How can she live with herself? But...

    Having been through my own personal hell 5 years ago with someone who lied, and having shed many tears in my pity parties, like you I am trusting in God for vindication. Somehow this has strengthened my character, and I now know that what others think of me is inconsequential, as I'm sure you have found to be the case as well.

    If it's any consolation - your husband is very easy on the eyes, hehe. And loving his wife and children like he does makes him even more beautiful.

    Have a blessed Christmas Jennifer...praying for you!